Monday, June 9, 2008

When Bad Neurons Happen to Good People

Help. Me.

Does anyone else see what is wrong with this picture?

Oh, yes. That? Is lunacy in a fridge. Insanity in the icebox.

You, my dear, are observing the last of my neurons misfiring in a dangerous attempt to filter through what used to be my brain matter to find the file that tells my hand where to put the cereal.

The sad part is? I actually closed the refrigerator door before I realized what I had done. And then I about laughed myself into an asthma attack once I did. Because after all? What else can one do when they put the cereal in the fridge?

Lest you think this is an isolated event, allow me to share a quote from this past weekend. I was asking my parents, who had stayed overnight and were helping me prepare breakfast, "Do you need self-purpose flour to make the biscuits?"

Take a second.

Re-read it.

Self-purpose flour.

"Um, honey, do you mean self-rising? Yes, you need self-rising flour."

I totally do not blame them if they start talking really, really slow to me.

I don't know if it's the hormones that still have not righted themselves, or maybe it's because I'm now thinking for three people instead of two. Or maybe my brain has been tapped by the alien in the Indiana Jones movie a la Cate Blanchett.

Please, please tell me I'm not the only one.

Or if I am, please humor me.



Michelle said...

I think you were too busy texting me about the Tv show last night.
So your brain was thinking about what you we were gonna say next!!! Gotta love it.

Leigh Ann said...

I'm singing that Michael Jackson song to you right now..."You are not alone,I am here with you..." Ha! I think we DO share the same brain or we are really long lost sisters. I do stuff like that ALL the time. If it makes you feel better...I tore the door off my Trailblazer (yes, my vehicle) by not shutting Evan's door before I barreled out of the garage. I had to repeat what I had done three times to Derek before he could believe I actually did that. It happens when you have a baby. Then, more brain neurons are sucked out the more babies you have. I'm sorry to tell you, it never improves, just gets worse! At least you're not alone. You make me laugh!

Rosie said...

I call it "Mommy Brain"...been accused of having it several times in the past two years...and it's getting worse. Love the pic of you before you went to the hospital!

Laura said...

Too funny!! Let me just ask this: Was the cereal box EMPTY?? Ha, ha! If you say, yes, then I think my husband snuck over there and left your cereal box in the fridge! He is prone to put empty milk containers and our tea pitcher back in the fridge EMPTY!!!! Can you tell it's a common pet peeve of mine? God love him!

Meag said...

Crackin' me up! Literally laughed out loud on this one! I feel your pain!!!

Megan L Hutchings said...

This is HILARIOUS! Trust me...YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! I have done things like this too many times to count. Just the other night I told Web I had a tummy in my knot...WHAT?

Valerie said...

Welcome to the real world!!!! I, too, laughed out loud over this one, not so much because of what you did, but rather, because of what I did today. I made raspberry muffins for breakfast, and then when I needed some vegetable oil to prepare supper, I couldn't find it ANYWHERE!!!!!!! Guess where I found it? You guessed it - in the fridge. Never knew we had so much in common. Trust me: your neurons are fine.

Sarah Johnson said...

Hi Lauren
I love your blog. And Dawson is so cute. Last time I saw you, you were still pregnant! Meagan didn't tell me you'd had the baby, so I guess I was lost in my world and didn't realize that much time had passed. I can't believe he's so big already.